AROUND THE WEIRD // FEBRUARY 2013
BY RACHEL CRISP PHILIPS
TO THE CATBUS
Artful Dodger, an English cat named for the sly street urchin in Oliver Twist, has lived up to his namesake by regularly sneaking out to ride the local bus without his owner’s observation. Fee Jeanes, the cat’s human, suggests that Dodger’s escapades are encouraged by the greenhouse-like warmth of the vehicle’s interior, although the kindness of strangers certainly doesn’t hurt. The ginger feline had gained quite a reputation while on his own, being fed by passengers and warming friendly laps, before his owner learned of his long journeys - some up to 10 miles round trip. In response to the 15-year old cat’s adventures, a spokesperson for the bus line commented, “Given this cat is elderly we suspect it would be eligible for free travel, perhaps a bus puss, if such a thing existed.” (The Telegraph)
THE OLDEST EDUCATION
Soccer players aren’t the only ones getting geared up for the 2014 World Cup to be held in Brazil. To prepare for the influx of foreign visitors, free language lessons are being offered in selected host cities to workers of all kinds, and prostitutes are signing up in droves. The sex workers, performing a legal profession in their country, are expected to benefit from the multi-lingual training with enhanced communication skills for negotiating their trade with tourists of all nationalities. (The Sun)
FATHERS GOT GAME
Upset with the amount of time his unemployed son spent playing the massively-multiplayer online game World of Warcraft, a desperate Chinese father organized a virtual assassination. With the paid aid of some willing players, his son’s in-game character was relentlessly hunted and killed at every possible opportunity with the intention of destroying the game’s appeal. Ultimately, one of the gamers revealed their paternally purchased motivation when pressed by the victim and the family has since reconciled. (BBC)
GIRL TROUBLE
For a set of wary parents in California, it was wise to be suspicious when their teenage daughter offered to buy them milkshakes out of the blue. Sure enough, when the frozen treats arrived, something tasted off and not quite delicious. Soon both parents were asleep, the work of a crafty combination of sleeping pills and rebellion at the hands of their own daughter over a disagreement on her 10 p.m. internet curfew. After a groggy morning and a voluntary drug test, the jig was up and the daughter confessed to mixing a friend’s prescription into the dessert so they could both access the World Wide Web late into the night. Both teens have been formally charged and booked into the local juvenile hall. (CBS Sacramento)
IN HEAVEN THERE IS NO BEER
Defying security systems and medical care, a 94-year-old man successfully escaped from a clinic in Munich, Germany on a quest for a beer hall and celebratory birthday beer. Undaunted by his age and condition, the elderly fellow made it all the way to an underground rail station before a good Samaritan noticed the IV needle still lodged in the man’s hand. After several calls to authorities, the details emerged and the man was returned to medical care where he received the beer of his choice. (The Local)